Yesterday, while having a life conversation with some friends, a friend asked the question “isn’t school stressful?” I made the response “you are in control of your stress.” Not quite sure why I said that but it got me thinking if I really meant what I said.
Being a fresh graduate and out of school, my friends and I have many conversations evolving around our current transition of student life to working life. Well, for some of us, our job just became the center of our lives and for others, more school takes the spot. Except this time, school is more focused for a purpose which leads to a choice in career.
We’re all on the same boat, the one that is in search of a career that enables us to do what we like and make us like what we do; a career that really doesn’t seem like a career but more like a hobby and lifestyle.
I’ve been a student my whole life, and I’m not really planning to stop, just a pause. Not sure if that’s because of the pressures of others telling me I should further pursue graduate school or because I want it myself. In all honesty, I think I want to go back to school to prove that I’m not a bad student. My undergraduate record would say otherwise. This is the exact reason why I want to go back to school and pursue another degree. To put my past underneath a higher degree and to prove to myself that I’m more capable than the numbers that is apparently a reflection of my capabilities as a learner. But as I think about the stress that I easily hid and kept shut tight internally while in school, my anxiety levels are rising as they would every time I went to check my test scores and grades. The anxiety caused me stress that I learned to accept but was not able to handle without further worry and regrets for my future and past.
In some ways, I feel that stress is a good thing because it causes me to take actions and in some ways it’s awful because of the burden it causes and the toll it takes on my mentality. I choose to have stress because I choose to react to the events in my life in that way. Many people do and it’s okay. Nevertheless, it also chooses you in order for you to better yourself.
Whether it’s school or a job or a life event that happens, we are in control of how we react, and more obviously, if we want to stay with it or just leave it. We often choose to stay and handle it because that’s the norm. So in that way, we choose for stress to stay even though it chose us first.